Free humour Kindle books for 02 Mar 19

Cheeky Royal (Royals Undercover Book 1)

by Nana Malone

I never wanted the throne
I have a plan: find my long-lost brother & make him the prince so I don’t have to rule. 
The last thing I have time for is my sexy new neighbor. She’s everything I don’t want, sassy, funny and…not available. 

That’s okay–I’m amazing best-guy-friend material.. Friends? Sure. Anything more? Definitely not. 

All I have to do is not touch her, kiss her or fantasize about…never mind…

It’s not like I have a choice. I can’t let her find out who I really am. And she’s got secrets of her own.



Memes: Super Funny Memes : Memes Funny Collection

by Joe Billy

Check the hilarious meme book for hours of big laugh.
Scroll to the top and press the “Buy” button!!!



Memes: Memes Funny Book : Laugh Memes Clean

by Joe Billy

Check the hilarious meme book for hours of big laugh.
Scroll to the top and press the “Buy” button!!!



Go Blog Yourself

by Tony Teri

Hysterically absurd thoughts from the mind of a true cynical man. The author takes on relationships, commerce, sex, fertility testing, children, work, craigslist, and coffin advertisements.



So Long, Stan: Our Singular Spanish Road Trip

by A. R. Lowe

SO LONG, STAN is the humorous account of a hair-raising tour around Spain and Portugal.

When young Andy Lambert meets a friendly compatriot at a beach near Benidorm, little does he suspect what lies ahead. Tempted away from his dull hotel job, he and his new pal Stan head north on a road trip which gradually turns into an odyssey so strange and perilous that Andy can’t believe what he’s let himself in for. Initially unprepared for this unexpected walk on the wild side, he becomes so embroiled in Stan’s shenanigans that he fears there’ll be no way back to his previous life. His only chance of salvation will be to think as cunningly as his companion does.



How to Get a Rich Woman: The secrets of wealth with other peoples money (Comedy How To Books Book 2)

by Tyler Moses

Jumping into bed with money is not just a woman’s pursuit, especially in this new age of equal rights and career-chasing females. If being one of those men whose finances are looked after by a Rich Woman during the marriage years and beyond is what you aspire, then this book is for you. It will teach you exactly how to go about making that happen.

Learn how to get a Rich Woman by giving her what she wants and needs. We define the different types of Rich Woman you should be looking out for. Learn ways to turn yourself into a marriage prospect, depending on what kind of woman you choose to go for. Here we can teach you how to avoid failure with hints and tips to improve your physical appearance and personality traits. All you need to be more attractive to your soon to be “cash cow” (never call her this by the way)

Living in debt and with no prospects is no life for a hot-blooded man like you. In fact, bringing money into your life is every bit as possible for you with the right woman. A Rich Woman. If you dream of a better life with no more 9-5 and better odds than winning the lottery buy this book and invest in yourself�� so she can invest in you.

Get a Rich Woman to fund your fantasy lifestyle Now!.

A Comedy Parody Book For Entertainment.



101 Poo Poems by Dr. Deuce

by Duke Jarboe

A collection of poemsâ??101 to be exactâ??of the musings of poopings, to which you’ll react, with snickering and giggling, while you are hopefully, taking a crap. And each poem here, is presented of course, with an illustration, that’ll have you smiling from ear to ear.



A Capitalist Carol: The heroic tale of Ebenezer Scrooge and that free-loading Bob Cratchit

by Ted Satterfield

Resurrected 150 years after his death, Charles Dickens must transform “A Christmas Carol” into “A Capitalist Carol,” for use in American schools. Viewing Ebenezer Scrooge as a hero, not a villain, proponents of the Modern Truth Movement demand Dickens portray Ebenezer Scrooge as an ideal capitalist, while depicting Bob Cratchit as a freeloading loser who deserves to be poor.

When Dickens learns the inmate working in the cubicle next to him, Friedrich Nietzsche, is part of a resistance that’s hellbent on stopping this manipulation of truth, he joins the movement, not just to end his suffering, but to protect the integrity of his work.

Both funny and philosophical, this dystopian humor novel unfolds in an innovative style, as it depicts a tale about truth, and the liars who craft it.



Memes Book: Funny Jokes Collection – Dank Slav Meme Edition

by Lee Novak

The most funny dank memes from all over the slav web. Some of them are completely in English and some are preserved in the authentic format but supported with an accurate translation. Hope you’ll enjoy it!



The Manly Marriage Manual: Fifty Ways to Man Up to Your Wife

by Rob Gleghorn

This manual is written for men…by a man. It entails fifty things a man can do, a real man that is. Every principle is true, time-tested and works every time it’s tried. Each idea is real simple…carrying them out isn’t; which is why you have to “man up” for your marriage to be of value, especially for long periods of time…like anything more than five days. But if you want to love your woman, really love her, through your actions and not just your constantly-flapping lips, this is the manual for you. And it is in fact a manual.

Many of us often hear the phrase, “I don’t want another ‘how to’ book!” Well in my marital experience the last 27 years, that’s exactly what we men need. Tell me what to do and I’ll do it! How may times have you blasted your wife with, “Just tell me what you want?” Now you don’t have to scream anymore…I have it all (OK, 37%) laid out for you, and you ‘re welcome.

Lastly is the humor. Every principle is short, sweet, funny and to the point. I don’t have time to read entertainment crap…and my guess is neither do you. I want to laugh and have what I read make a difference in my life. This manual will do just that for you. You will laugh…I promise, because the stories (and principles) are all true. But more importantly, you will learn from my idiocy…the good, bad, and ugly. This is a manual that tells you what to do, every day, all day, any day. All you have to do is pick one idea, one mere thought, and do it, and your relationship will improve for the day, the week, even the year if you keep doing just one thing, let alone all fifty. Good luck and God speed my brothers…although I don’t believe in luck, and I don’t really know what God speed is, but I’m sure it’s quite fast.



Dime Bags Volume II

by Richard Buckinghard

Self-acclaimed author Richard Buckinghard reinvents literary excellence with the release of Dime Bags Vol. II. Through ten unique and power packed short stories, Dime Bags Vol. II reaches deep into humanity’s soul. What it brings back are the hopes, dreams and aspirations of us all. We invite you to expand your horizons and leap into the world of Dime Bags. In this volume of Dime Bags you will receive short stories such as:

* Peter Parkman and the rise of the Green Gobbler
* Ah crap my Toblerone melted
* Detective Dunke and the case of the hickory hambone
* Stop! Or my penis will shoot!…

…and six more! Reduce your carbon footprint and get a copy of Dime Bags today.



The Elmo Jenkins Red Boxed Set

by McMillian Moody

The Elmo Jenkins Red Boxed Set includes the first four full length Elmo Jenkins novels.

Ordained Irreverence
Some Things Never Change
The Old Man and the Tea
A Tale of Two Elmos

You get over 900 pages of hilarious anecdotes, touching stories, and spiritual insights all woven into the day-to-day life of young minister, Elmo Jenkins.

The readers say it best: “Not since Mitford has the day-to-day life of a minister been so much fun.”



CONJURING GOD

by Jason Howl

A group of young believers invent a ritual to invoke their Lord and Shepherd. But the God they summon is hungry as a wolf.



A Nice Rebellion: A novel

by Artemus Root

A comic tale of a man’s attempt to change his personality.

Ford Wilkinson’s self-esteem was low at the best of times, but now it had just reached ankle level. The reasons were bizarre. His artist girlfriend had dumped him for the crazy reason that his shapes were all wrong, and he was now at risk of losing his job from the company that his late father had set up because he was not just nice, he was too nice!
Taking drastic action to improve his confidence and save his career, Ford seeks help from a dubious hypnotherapist to change his personality.
Unfortunately for Ford, his plans did not take into account meeting the feisty and impulsive Nina Summer, whose extrovert behaviours force him into madcap situations that test his new persona to the full.
To add to his burdens, Nina publicly reveals a lewd, erotic incident that will unknowingly change their future.

Ancient proverb: A leopard cannot change its spots.

Ford Wilkinson’s proverb: A leopard can change its spots with hypnotherapy.



Die Empty

by Kirk Jones

middle age (midâ?²l-āj) n. 1. Spending one year’s disposable income on vinyl figures, only to realize a complete He-Man collection isn’t going to make your current life any better. Beast Man and Cyclops don’t give a fuck about you or your failing marriage. 2. Resolving to die empty and alone. 3. Death showing up at your office door in need of a vacation. 4. Designing goods for Death that inspire consumer-driven fatalitiesâ??faulty steering mechanisms, toxic dishwasher detergent inserts that look like jumbo fruit snacksâ??anything that will help tip people over the edge before Death has to pursue them. 5. Waking to find your house chock-full of the merchandise you created, merchandise designed to kill. Now everything from pouring your cereal to activating your car’s cigarette lighter has become a death trap. Yet as your world falls apart, no matter how hard you try, you can’t seem to fucking die.



Always a Cold Deck (A Harry Reese Mystery Book 1)

by Robert Bruce Stewart

In July 1900, hapless insurance investigator Harry Reese travels to Buffalo to look into a suspicious fire. But when Harry uncovers a smuggling ring, the case morphs into something more sinister, and he’s faced with a new set of questions. What’s become of the notorious ringleader? Was the missing Charles Elwell killed for the insurance money? Or is he alive and sharing in the proceeds? And is his comely niece merely trying to divert Harry’s attentionâ??or is she truly as eccentric as she appears?

To find the answers, Harry travels to Canada and back in the company of a political boss’s conniving stooge and the aforementioned nutty niece. It’s a byzantine odyssey, during which Harry can never be sure of anyone’s loyalties, least of all those who’ve hired him. And when it’s all over, he finds himself wedded to a new conundrum, which makes what went before pale in comparisonâ?¦.

For more information on the series, please visit: HarryReeseMysteries.com



Escape Route: Murder Off-Screen Cozy Series Book 1

by GA VanDruff

One great dog is about to have one fine day
– after he catches the bad guys.

Love Stephanie Plum? Escape Route is your next fun read!
Dognappers. Hit men. Her ex-husband.

A happy yellow Lab, an unhappy green gecko, her ex’s new wife, and a conniving political climber make short work of her vacation. Can Jaqie save the hapless dog, the hopeless ex’s new marriage, and finish her next screenplay before the deadline?

Join in this fun-filled chase around the Chesapeake Bay, and find out if Jaqie can outsmart the hitmen, get her ex’s extremely pregnant wife to the hospital in time, catch the dognappers, and deal with each and every relative hanging around the Shanahan family tree!

Buy Escape Route and enjoy GA VanDruff’s light-hearted tale of fun and suspense!



Chess Fairy Tales

by Azat Kadyrov

á?¦ Dear readers á?¦

In this book your children will be able to discover the interesting world of chess through fairy tales.

â?? The basic chess rules, such as: “Stalemate”, “Sacrifice” and other concepts are discovered here.

â?¥ Meet Muffin, who received a magical book when he woke up in the morning.

â?¥ Find out about an unusual dog that could play chess.

â?¥ What did Bebe do when he was trapped in the house of an old witch?

â?¥ What happened to the black bird who was stealing the chess pieces at school?

â?¥ How was the journey of a little boy who decided to travel to the coldest place, called Siberia?

These and many other interesting fairy tales are waiting for you in this book. They are easy to read, funny, motivating and will bring joy to your children. Welcome to the new world of Chess! â?º



The Glory of Xi: A Screenplay

by joe basara

Xi Panda, President of China, does not trust the People App on his phone that always assures him the people of China love him, no matter want he does or says. He tells his wife he would like to go out and meet the people and find out what they really think of him. she thinks this is a foolish idea, but he insists. In the morning, he ventures into the streets of Beijing, in peasant’s clothes. He meets coal miners, a salesman, college students, a business woman, a Buddhist monk, and others. He is surprised to hear their opinions about him and about the communist party, opinions he would never hear if they knew who he really was. He realizes he loves the poor, working people more than he does those who have become rich through business activities. When he returns home that evening, he admits to his wife that he loves her more than he does the communist party.



English word games: Fill in the crosswords in as many ways as possible – Second part (Funny English Book 3)

by Elisa Lovato

Lovers of word games, accept this challenge! Fill in the crosswords in as many ways as possible!



THE NOSE (The Meaning of Fruth Book 3)

by Hari Manev

The Nose builds on and expands the fruths introduced in the preceding two books, The Eye and The Ear. This satirical allegory examines the various facets of binary worldview.

Web Socialism or Oroism? Which one will win the puzworlders’ hearts and minds? The wooden plank carrying Tlag and Fidelio from Oceania wrecks on a deserted island full of oro. There they establish Xoroxia, a utopian society of free slugs and snails. Using the newly acquired wealth, Tlag and Fidelio embark on revealing the secret of Bildertal. In this action-packed finale of the trilogy The Meaning of Fruth, the old cast of Snailwood characters, Archie, Charlene, Eikoku, Samantha, Dr. Shupak, and Meta and Data are joined by the new ones. The renown puzworld fabulist Isope of Nesebaron also shows up, along with the one-of-a-kind creatures, Emerald Elysia and Blue Butterfly, and their creator, Evolution. How will progress alter the future of Snailwood and Slugwood? What is the origin of gastropods’ fascination with tattoos? What is puzworld? What is the meaning of life? Not all these questions will be answered by The Nose, but the readers will be entertained and inspired to look for the missing answers in their own (puz)worlds.



Danger …With a Hard G

by Matthew David Brozik

*Named one of the Best Comedy Books of 2017 by SPLITSIDER*

Harrison Danger Bennett is a private investigator. He has an office, a secretary, and a gun that he keeps unloaded because he doesn’t want to shoot anybody. And now he has a new case. When a woman hires him to find his own best friend, it seems like easy money because Bennett already knows where the other man is. Unfortunately, that’s just when Bennett’s friend disappears. It figures.

DANGER …WITH A HARD G is a tight-plotted, lighthearted caper more or less in the hardboiled mold. Colorful characters mingle with terrible puns. Schemes are uncovered. Leads are followed. Sandwiches are eaten. And the day might even be saved.

– For every copy sold, at least $1 of the proceeds will be donated to the ACLU. For real.



MacToons: A MacPaint Tribute to the Original Macintosh

by Mackay Bell

A collection of 30 comic strips created in MacPaint from 1984-1987 celebrating the original Macintosh.



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